I love to read. Its a problem. I have banned myself from getting library books because i have absolutely no selfcontrol when it comes to getting anything else done or getting to the end of a story. I used to just check out audiobooks on tape or cd.....then my tape player ate 2 of the library tapes and i was down to cds. It is awkward in a way that u have to be so careful of the content, no unexpected cursing or anything if u have kids around. Sooooo then i got a cd player to carry with me as i worked around the house and did my sewing or driving. That was good tho a lil awkward again at times......then entered the playaway audiobooks. Super duper compact, just like an mp3 player. They use a single AAA battery and it lasts thru several playbacks. If the battery runs out in the middle of the story then when u put the new one in the story picks right up where u left off! Ok, so now i have easy mobility, great literature, flexibility, and i can still get the things done that i need to get done. YAY!
Its been 7 1/2 yrs since the end of my first marriage. I really thought that some issues i was dealing with in counseling my children would be done with. I find myself back at some of the basics like, do u love me really? did u abandon us? am i good enough to be an acceptable and likable individual just by being myself? Man, its really hard when 85% of the time they are being fed either untrue or distorted images of things and i only have part of that other 15% of the time to counter the negativity. Its really hard. But i pray that i made the right choice and that my children can appreciate the difficulty of the decision at the time and my intentions. They are still children right now and it will be some time before they can fully appreciate an adult's perspective in trying to secure for them a chance at a different future than the one that was being written for them. My friend is a child of divorce and she suggested the book by Judith Wallerstein, The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce. I wish i had read it before i embarked on this journey and its a must read for anyone with children who may be in a situation where they may either be thinking about divorce or they are already divorced. Extremely insightful and shows us some of the reasons why Allah dislikes it so much. The affects are tremendous!
I finally broke down and went to the beautician and got my hair 'did'. I have always been proud of the fact that i understood how to take care of my hair and grow and style it myself.....well, it seems that the past two yrs of experimenting had left me at a total loss and looking like an ogre everyday up top. I was so embarrassed to be around my husband, thats bad. He always told me that everyone has good days and bad days and my bad hair days didnt bother him....code for i love u, but i wouldnt mind if u put the scary ogre style away and just went and got ur hair 'did' by either a friend or a professional. He cant seem to stop staring at me and giving me complements on how pretty i look now. He keeps touching my hair....now the price of that beautician was absolutely worth every penny!!!!!
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